An Imagination Workout

A client last week had a decision to make and was finding it difficult. Not a major life decision, but one that would impact upon several areas of her life.  I pulled out some blank paper and told her to write down or draw all the things that were important to her. I sat back and let her imagination take over. Once she finished, we then looked at the decision and checked how it stacked up against what she had determined were the most important things in her life. The decision became obvious to her, and she announced it with great personal satisfaction and complete ownership.

This week it was my turn. I have been putting off a decision for a good month or more, and today was the last chance I had to make it or tuck my tail between my legs and lay blame elsewhere: my to-do list, my family, my bank, my pet, my pen that ran out - you know, anywhere but with me. I'm a coach! I can't admit to a lack of skills, smarts, esteem, ability to manage myself! I thought back to my amazing client and decided I could do with my own imagination workout. I got out a large blank scrapbook I use for brainstorming, found a coloured pen with ink, and started to write. Wow, what an exercise! I thought I knew what was important in a vague, nebulous kind of way, but to see the words right there on paper: Wow. And it wasn't just the words, it was where some of the words overlapped, where patterns became visible, that really impressed upon me what truly pulled my heartstrings.

Something else that happened this week to guide my next decision. A friend of mine was telling me how sick to death she was of her boyfriend's mess, and how she recently announced to him that she would no longer visit him at his home or spend weekends with him there. No attack, no manipulation, no aggression. A simple but profound statement that said, What I need is important too, and this is my decision. I was so impressed.

And so I announced to my family who were blaring Prince's music and doing their thing on a Saturday morning that I was going to the library. No fights about my need for quiet, or being a martyr and whining about how little my needs mean, or demanding more support. (I know, I know, pathetic!) I felt empowered and that I had edged closer to an item on my list: self mastery. Ahhh, now doesn't that have a nice ring to it?